How cliche. Heart-shaped cookies for Valentines. So clever.
Oh c’mon! Look at the name of my blog. Where you seriously expecting skull-shaped pancakes? Bomb-like chocolates with raspberry filling that explodes in your mouth?
If you feel like puking already over the avalanche of red bows + pink cakes + heart-shape everything everywhere, well, I come with a great idea: Simply make my cookies + break em’ in half with an evil look + we’ll call it a vengeance, alright? It’s rebellious, yet not creepy enough to put you in jail for a bloody Valentine’s crime.
I told you I’m getting smarter. I eat cookies that don’t make me feel like crap. Oh yeah, cuz you will still look sexy in lingerie when you eat these. They are gluten free + dairy free + vegan + refined sugar free + ridiculously delicious. Cuz healthy shouldn’t taste like cardboard. That’s an ultimatum.
Here’s how to make your batch of No Heart Attack Chocolate Chip Cookies:
- 1 cup all purpose gluten free flour
- 1/4 cup unsweetened shredded coconut
- 1 teaspoon baking powder
- 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
- 1/2 teaspoon salt
- 1/4 cup coconut oil, melted
- 1/3 cup pure maple syrup
- 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
- 1/2 cup cacao nibs or dark chocolate chips/mini chunks
- Heart-shaped cookie cutter (optional)
Step 1: Preheat oven 400°F.
Step 2: Prepare a baking sheet + line with foil.
Step 3: Mix flour + coconut + baking powder + baking soda + salt in a large bowl. It’s essential that these ingredients are evenly spread throughout your cookie dough, before it goes in the oven.
Step 3: Mix coconut oil + maple syrup + vanilla extract together in another mixing bowl. Give it a good stir.
Step 4: Pour the wet mixture into the dry mixture + mix with a wooden spoon. Add the cacao nibs or dark chocolate chips. With your hands, compress the cookie dough into a ball, until the chocolate is well incorporated.
Step 5: Take 1 generous tablespoon of cookie dough into your hands + compress it + roll it into a ball. You can either flatter the balls slightly on the prepared baking sheet to make round cookies or you can press the ball of dough into the cookie cutter to mould it into heart shape. Don’t worry if the cookie dough is a bit oily before entering the over, that’s normal.
Step 6: Makes about 15 cookies.
Step 7: Bake the cookies for 10-12 minutes, until they start to brown slightly. Remove the baking sheet from the heat + using a spatula, transfer the cookies to a wire rack + allow to cool for at least 5 minutes before serving.
Step 8: Store in an airtight container for up to 3 days. Serve with fresh almond milk.
And cuz everything is sweeter with a whimsical little tag made with love, I’ve made them available for you too. Not hating The Cupid so much anymore, are you? LOL! I thought so too.
Time to put on my new ba ba boom Pull Up Cherry Dress. Got a date with a really hot man with beard that’s sitting in my couch playing FIFA. Not for long thou. BUAAHAHAHAHA!
Continuing with the rated X programing. What you doing (said like Joy from Friend’s would) for Valentine’s? Will you be lighting up candles or stabbing your Sad Sam stuffed puppy? Tell me in the comments.